Thought for Thursday | Bending and Breaking | 2017 #01

Hello lovelies,

It’s been another long while, hasn’t it. Almost a year, in fact. And what a year 2016 was…

To kick things back into action on here it seemed appropriate to start with a Thought for Thursday, because thinking is something I’ve been doing a shitload of recently. I’d like to share some of those thoughts here and now.

Sourced from Pinterest

Last year was, without a shadow of a doubt, the worst and most difficult of my life to date. It just seemed to be one thing after another after another after another, and not even necessarily huge things: it was a year of spilled wine and forgotten umbrellas and tangled headphones. Little inconveniences which on their own could have easily been dismissed but, in conjunction with the bigger things, just lent themselves to making a bad year even worse.

2016 was the year I moved to Nottingham, further away from my family than ever. It was the year my mental health took a tumble. It was the year I lost my wonderful grandfather to cancer we didn’t even know he had. It was the year my job was dangled in front of me and eventually snatched away. It was twelve months of loneliness, homesickness, tears, regret, and guilt.
On a more global scale, in 2016 the world said goodbye to David Bowie, Carrie Fisher, Alan Rickman, and George Michael, amongst numerous other stars. June saw Britain vote to leave the EU in Brexit, a movement which coined the eventual word of the year, and pussy-grabbing businessman Donald Trump was elected 45th President of the United States in November. (Side note: I’ll never forget waking up in a hungover haze at Glastonbury Festival, checking my phone for the Brexit results, and just bursting into tears at the shock and hopelessness of it all. Ugghhh.)

Black Mirror, anyone?

After the disaster that was 2k16, it stands to reason that 2k17 will be a year of worldwide success and joy, right? Well, I am determined to make this year better than the last; it really couldn’t be worse. Last year left me bent and bruised emotionally, but the thing about taking a beating is that, afterwards, you must stand up and dust yourself off – otherwise you’ll be lying there in the dirt letting the world treat you as its doormat for the rest of forever.

I’m proud to have already started by taking this year by the horns and turning it in a positive direction. I began cognitive behavioural therapy and a course of new medication in a bid to fight an anxiety disorder and mild depression which have ruled my life for years. Both are going pretty well for now – look out for a future post dedicated to all things mental health.
In October, J and I adopted two adorable degus, who have proved to not only be gorgeous and mischievous but also quite therapeutic in their own right!
Tomorrow is mine and J’s five-year anniversary (!).
I’ve started learning Italian with the help of Duolingo, and plan on learning Cornish later in the year.
Glasto 2017 is the main motivation to keep going to the gym we joined last summer (I know, right). 

So 2017 is already looking up! The importance of bending but not allowing yourself to break completely has never been felt more fully. There were times last year where I truly thought nothing would ever be good or bright again – but here we are, blinking in the hazy January sunshine after spending a year in a dark, shadowy cave. We are human. We weather the storms life throws at us and ride them out because we know there will always be sunshine after: a reward for not breaking in two.

Sorry not sorry for all the clichés in this post! Was your 2016 a storm, or were you walking on sunshine? If you have any ideas for future blogs or TFTs, let me know in a comment.
Also, please do check out the new blog I’ve set up for our degus and give it some love!

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